Stacey Diane, Practically Perfect in Every Way.

Other than my children, the thing I am most grateful for is my family, so I thought I would take a few minutes to say something about them. My sister is 25. That makes me 13 years older than her...which means nothing other than her butt is better than mine. Well, OK, and she has no gray hair and crows feet...but we are the same age everywhere else. She is determined, fierce, funny, trustworthy, has great rhythm and is the best aunt I have ever witnessed. She laughs like nobody on the planet, with her nostrils and shoulders shaking, she sounds like a chicken with hiccups. I used to call her at work and say ridiculous things just to make her lose it. She actually had to make a sign that she held up that said, "I am ok, I am talking to my sister" because people thought she was choking.

She has never once failed to come when I need her, and although I am older, she is wiser and frequently talks me down from the ledge. She is one of my best friends and confidants.

We have driven to Disneyland on a whim, seen hundreds of movies and spent hours driving aimlessly sharing secrets and snacks. In February of 2007, we drove to the Natural Bridge up in Payson. On a slick, 2 lane, mountain road, with a 1500 foot cliff on one side and a mountain on the other, my back tires slid out from under the suburban and we crashed. We slammed into the mountain and then started to flip. All I could think about as we rolled over and over was that we were going over the edge. When we finally stopped, we were upside down. Surrounded by glass, I couldn't imagine how I was going to get Stacey out without cutting her to shreds. We both felt something push us over to upright at the same time. We are sure it was our Dad. :) When we landed, we looked at each other and she yelled, "Put on the brake, " and we had to climb out the windows. There was no cell reception, and we were on a rarely traveled forest road, so we had to wait for someone to come by and had to send them to get a park ranger. It was terrifying, but we walked away unscathed. She had a cut on her palm, I had some broken ribs and a concussion, and we both had wicked whiplash. We spent the next few days recuperating by laying on my trampoline in the sunshine in pain, but laughing. Laughing because we could, because we were alive, because we were together and because it would take more than a slippery mountain road to take us from each other.

She is one of my heroes and I am thankful to my Heavenly Father for allowing us to be together.

I look forward to seeing what happens in her life as she gets older. It will be every bit as amazing as her.

Love?

Thinking a lot about love and what it means to be "in love." People frequently express the sentiment that they love someone, but they are not in love with them. What does that mean?

I love my children, I love my family, I love my dog, I love blueberries, I love the sound of Hawley Lake and the smell of the ocean, but how can my love for blueberries equal how I feel about my children? The answer is that it cannot. There are all different kinds of love.

With that being said, what am I looking for in my life? What kind of love am I interested in having for me? What kind of relationship, what kind of man? Marriage or living together? Manly he-man or sensitive guy......can you find both in one man? Can you truly love one person for the rest of your life? FOREVER?

I think I am looking for a man who can communicate. Someone who will discuss the events of the day and life with me and listen to me prattle on endlessly about nothing while still thinking I am charming. (Good luck, right?) Someone who can laugh at himself and the chaos of life and be able to talk me down when I let it all get to me. Someone brave. Someone who WANTS to be with me, who thinks I am dead sexy. Someone who can sleep on the trampoline because the weather is nice, who knows I hate roses and that I have a thing for fresh sheets. Someone who will enjoy my attention and affection without feeling smothered and someone who doesn't mind watching as I slowly evolve into my grandmother.

I think I found him. I hope I found him. He makes me feel tingly and bubbly and hopeful for the first time in a century. I am scared. If this is not him, I am scared there will never be a HIM. If this man is not him after all, I don't think HE exists.

If Project Redwood is not the man I think he is, there is a very real possibility that I will become my neighborhood's 'Crazy Cat Lady.' Unfortunately, I am not a huge fan of cats, so I will have to settle for the 'Crazy Dog Lady' and that just doesn't have the same ring to it.

I am crossing my fingers and putting out all the positive energy I have in regards to this situation. I will jump......and if my bungee cord doesn't break my fall, at least I have had a hell of a ride.